Co-op – English Breakfast
Twinings – English Breakfast
I wanted to do a review of Co-op English Breakfast (or “Irresistible Bright and Refreshing English Breakfast Fairtrade Tea” to give it its full – and rather lengthy – title), but the problem with reviewing your standard everyday black tea blends is that it’s bally difficult to think of things to say about them.
So, I hit on what I thought was a genius idea. Why not conduct a head-to-head tea-off between Co-op English Breakfast and the English Breakfast of another major teamonger and see how it fares against the competition?
Twinings English Breakfast was selected for the task because it’s not too cheap, not too pricey and coincidently also for sale in the Co-op down the road. Also, Twinings English Breakfast hasn’t had a proper review here. (Although it did feature in 2021’s Tea Fancier Tea Cup Championships, where it was swiftly knocked out in the first round by Whittard.)
Did having two different English Breakfast teas to compare help with the finding-things-to-say-about-them issue? Not a bit of it.
Now I have two perfectly satisfactory, yet unremarkable, cups of tea to talk about.
Both teas are a solid three-star effort. They’re fine. I wouldn’t be ashamed to serve either one to visitors but neither would I present them with any kind of flourish or fanfare. Twinings is slightly nicer but I’m not sure why. Co-op’s effort was perhaps slightly weaker and more tannin-y but not so much that it would invite comparison with, say, PG Tips, which is simultaneously too strong, too weak and doesn’t really taste of tea.
Ingredients-wise Co-op English Breakfast consists of “carefully selected teas from Malawi, Southern India and Kenya”. And Twinings is slightly more coy about its tea origins admitting only to “a range of origins including Assam and Kenya”. What percentage of the tea is from Assam and Kenya? And what percentage is from somewhere else entirely? We simply don’t know.
I’m not sure who comes out top ethics-wise. Twinings are members of the Ethical Tea Partnership and their tea bags are now plant-based and recyclable. Co-op tea bags are fair trade but I’m not sure about their biodegradability. I do genuinely trust Co-op more than other supermarkets when it comes to being ethical good eggs.
So there you go. Two teas, which are both pleasant to drink, taste like tea, will wake you up in the morning and are suitable for dunking a biscuit in. And that’s it.
It’s a wonder more of my tea reviews aren’t like this, to be honest. “Yes, it’s a cup of tea. It tastes of tea. What else is there to say?”
Today’s book paring is Only Dull People are Brilliant at Breakfast by Oscar Wilde.
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